Pivotal Moment in Time

The moments described in the following three photos correspond to a huge part of my life filled with trials and uncertainties. These moments have affected me still two years later, and will forever remind me what my family has been through. Although the people in the photographs are smiling, it is not because of the present circumstance. It is simply because there are no more tears. It is a smile out of hopelessness because there is nothing you can do to change what has happened. You have no control over it. Or maybe just because smiling is "what you are supposed to do in a photograph." Or maybe out of hopes to forget or conceal the pain.
The first photograph is of my two oldest nephews Isaiah, 10 and Eli, 8. Taken two years ago the day after Christmas, we had been in Tennessee with my family. My sister and her sick husband Jon had stayed back in MN because he was in the hospital. She called to inform us that he might not make it, something beyond unexpected. All 15 of us got on the next flight out to be with her and wait.
The second photograph was taken at the hospital waiting...because that's what we did. For three months, we waited. Exhausted. Day. Night. The baby on my lap is my nephew Cash, Jon's youngest. At the time he was just eight months old. It breaks my heart to think that he will never know what a great man his dad was.
The final photo is of me and my nephew Walker, then three. He was Jon's oldest son. We were on the way to bury Jon near my home in rural Minnesota. As heartbreaking as this moment was, I knew that Walker didn't completely understand what was happening, he just knew that everyone was sad. I tried to adopt his innocence. It was short-lived.